Ask “what would you like to try?” and someone has to answer first. This game spares you both that step: you each tick what appeals from a list of 80 ideas, and the screen only ever shows what you both ticked.
How it works
Tick your wishes, then create your link. The page gives you the link and a six-digit code: the link can go through any chat you like, and the code should travel some other way, out loud if you can manage it.
Your partner opens the link and ticks their own wishes first, before seeing a thing. Then they type the code, and the page shows the matches. It also gives them a reply link holding only those matches, so you end up looking at the same list while the rest of their picks stay on their phone.
Have a short chat before you send anything, and tick honestly. A match is an invitation to talk, not a booking: either of you can leave a match alone for as long as you like, with no explaining to do, and what you do with the ones you both like, and when, is up to the two of you. The list is there for fun, and it stops being fun the moment it becomes a to-do list.
How private is it, really?
Your wishes get encrypted in your browser with AES-GCM. The key comes from the code, through 600,000 rounds of PBKDF2. They travel in the part of the link after the # sign, which browsers don’t send to any server, so we never receive them.
One limit to know about: six digits are enough against someone glancing at your chat, but a person with the link and enough patience could try every code, so keep the link private and the code separate.
There’s a human limit too. Your list gets decrypted on your partner’s phone, so a technical partner could dig it out, and one who ticks all 80 will see your entire list as the overlap. In other words, this is built for two people who already trust each other.
Asked and answered
Can we run this more than once?
Each link has its own code, so make a new one whenever your tastes change, as often as you like.
Can I read about the ideas first?
Our sex bucket list guide has a longer take on building one together, with suggestions that aren’t on this list.